Slowly but Shirley I'm discovering , in this brave new world, the shortcuts to life. Yes - that's right, skipping over the eye wateringly dreary parts and fast forwarding to the European strength juicy bits. I've started small.
For instance, I have no need for the crowds at Union Station now that I've found a saucy little door to the trains on Station Road (off York). Result! Like the Scarlett Pimpernel, you will never see me but somehow I still get home. In the spirit of Social Media, I want to share this tip de.li.cious...ly.
My next discovery will likely get me booted off the Women's Institute's Christmas card list but it's too clever to save for posterity: Avoid the logistics of Jim Jam tantrum time - the screaming, pooping and crying by not "being there". Get home just when the nipper is ready for a story and generously offer to take over. Here's the science - by spending that 'just in the door' time on storytelling duty you can seamlessly avoid the "ball & chain" game of - Anger: Real or Residual? then listen out for the hockey to start and only then join the party.
Finally avoid the utterly banal practice of drawing curtains by taking longer to brush your teeth.
You're welcome.
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